Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Day 17: Love Promotes Intimacy

Yesterday was a busy day so I didn't have time to type a blog let alone pick the book up and read it. My mom, Xay, and I took Mikaya back to her mom. That's a 3 and a half hour car ride one way listening to my mom complain about Chris, her car and other things. Let's just say it wasn't a pleasent ride. Kk's mom was glad for her to be back and so were her other brothers (her sister wasn't home yet). We stayed just a little bit and then headed back to Cincinnati.

While coming through Nati we made a pitstop and saw my biological dad. We talk frequently on the phone and through texts but I rarely get to actually see him. Truthfully this was my second time meeting him but I don't love him any less. I also met his wife...she seemed nice. They could have been the parents that raised me if Tina (my biological mom) hadn't had a chip on her shoulder and had be adopted. Still I am not ungrateful because my mom and daddy raised me the best they could and I love them just like I love my son...to the moon and back.

So today I read Day 17's pages in the Love Dare. It talks about being more intimate with the person you love. Allowing them to safeguard your secrets and you theirs. How life was originally intended back in the Garden with Adam and Eve. You know all naked and not ashamed. It's pretty much understood when you marry or even choose to coexist (which has become popular births are up with cohabitating parents) you are taking on each other problems...all the good, bad, beautiful, and ugly things each of you have in your life becomes part of the others life. And you work out all the kinks together. That's how it is supposed to be. It isn't something the appears overnight and it runs parrallel to trust. It's easily lost and takes a lifetime of effort to rebuild. Trust me I know. But you have to start somewhere and if you are actually reading this then you are probably willing to try.

My advice? Don't give up. Because once you loose that trust only you can work the big shit out and regain what was once yours. If you truly love the person you are with then it is worth it.

Today’s Dare
Determine to guard your mate’s secrets
(unless they are dangerous to them or to you)
 and to pray for them.
Talk with your spouse, and resolve to
demonstrate love in spite of these issues.
 Really listen to them when they share
personal thoughts and struggles with you.
Make them feel safe.