Saturday, July 2, 2005

Things are actually going really good. Ducky and I are doing great no more fighting so far. Things are just looking up. He has his little girl which means I can't see him as much as I would like to, but that's okay. She goes home next Sunday. The only time he gets her is when Kirby wants to party or what-not.

I went out there today, part of his moms family was there. I met his cousin, Lillian's sister, her daughter I think, and then her daughter. So yeah. It's all good fun. Lillian's sister was on Ducky's side about Kirby and me. She said that Kirby was just jealous cuz Ducky has a prettier girlfriend then she was, and that Lillian and Joe was doing me wrong. It was cool. Cheyanne took up to me and me and her went wading down the creek. It was really cool a peaceful in Ducky's mountains.

Now this is where everyone is going to kill me. Trust me I already know what you all are going to say. "Your a pretty girl and you have your whole life ahead of you." "You shouldn't make that kind of mistake." "Your going places." But please listen. You want to know my real dream? The one that only Ducky, and me know? I don't want to work, I don't want to go to college. I want to get married, live out in the county on a farm, with a white picket fence, and a tire swing. It also needs to have mountains and a creek. I want a big family (around 5 kids), and have lots of animals. I want to be a stay at home mom.

Now then as of that....Ducky and I have been talking about seriously getting married. Mom said she would sign the papers if we could prove to her we were capable of handling it, weren't going to fight, and were going to stay together. Which even if we do fight (which I have been told we fight like a married couple) we always make up. However be that as it may, now is the part you will frown on and lecture me about. We are trying to have a baby. As of right now there is a possiblity I could be pregnant. I highly doubt it, but there is a chance. Which we both have talked about it, I mean seriously talked about it, and how it would affect my life. In the end we both agreed to go for it.

So yeah I kinda expect comments on this entry, prolli a lot of people frowning on me. But that's okay....I know that being a teen mom isn't easy. I know that it takes a toll on your life. I know you lose out on a lot of things. But honestly.....it wouldn't be affecting me as much as people think.